Dojo Of Coolness
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Dikir Barat? Heng cute lioaz!
And so i was,sitting there in my maroon baju kurung looking like a roguish pirate from the Malaccan Empire era when the dikir barat group (Emas + Harapan) was introduced on stage. They were dressed in the traditional baju kurung complete with a headscarf like the girl in the KFC ads who claims to like it spicy. The aura imposed by the Tok Juara and the Tukang Karut was so overwhelming that it rivalled the time Earth was threatened by the arrival of Fliza that forced Son Goku to use all his Kame Hame Ha powers to defeat him(re:DragonBallZ episode 28). All of the dikir boys looked so "waduh waduh cute nye" in their baju kurung and headscarf with the fake smiles plastered on their faces,i swear Roy Keane would have had an erection.
And there he was. Blond hair,imitation Rayban aviator shades and a face even his own mother would wanna punch. This is when i knew something special would happen. We locked eyes with each other. He stared at me through his shades. I licked my lips. He started touching himself. I showed him my set of pink nipples. He ran his hand through his hair. I scratched my armpit. Azmi terkencit. He winked at me. That's when i knew it. This cannot be anything else.
This is...............................................
Love
He kept smiling at me throughout his performance and he kept giving me a "come-hither" look.
Oh gawdddddd,he was soo hot! I closed my eyes and i visualized my hottest most erotic fantasies involving him right on the spot and this is how it looked like......
after the performance was over, i approached him and bashfully introduced myself
and this is the conversation that ensued.
"hi name saya NinjaMuscle. kawan-kawan i panggil i Baby Bucuk."
"Oh.Name i Boi_Sachok. Tadi i peform sachok tak? Mesti sachok punye, tengok lah rambut i yg mohawk mcm babi nie abeh kaler blond. I dari tadi tengok you. You ni sachek ah"
I was soo embarassed but i was diggin his compliments,nawmean?
"takdelah. I tak lah sachek sgt. U tinggal ne? U uat ape? Waduh waduh."
"I dikir first eleven ah. Cuma yang paling sachok je boleh jadi dikir first eleven"
"eh Boi_sachok,mlm nie i nak gi hendrix atau chocolate bar ah. U nak ikut tak? kita leh minum2 Chivas Regal and pas tu dtg rumah i mlm2 tengok video.teehee.If u noe wat i mean..........." (gawddd,i can' believe i was that horny)
"Boleh ah pi i kene balik siang pasal i kene sembahyang subuh and pagi pagi i ade dikir practice. dikir practice important pasal kalau bukan kita nak preserve adat melayu,sape nak buat kan?
And kalau kita tak preserve adat melayu macam mane nak dapat budak-budak pompan sachek nak ajak gi clubbing? Betul tak?"
"betol tu abg sachok"
He then proceeded to take my number but he didn't call on Friday night. He didnt call on Saturday night too. I'm soo lonely i could cry. BOI SACHOKKK!!! WO AI NI! WEI SHE MAAAA!!
this is one of those emo moments where i take an emo picture of myself and edit it usin photoshop and add emo captions to highlight the obvious fact that i'm not getting any sex.
And there he was. Blond hair,imitation Rayban aviator shades and a face even his own mother would wanna punch. This is when i knew something special would happen. We locked eyes with each other. He stared at me through his shades. I licked my lips. He started touching himself. I showed him my set of pink nipples. He ran his hand through his hair. I scratched my armpit. Azmi terkencit. He winked at me. That's when i knew it. This cannot be anything else.
This is...............................................
Love
He kept smiling at me throughout his performance and he kept giving me a "come-hither" look.
Oh gawdddddd,he was soo hot! I closed my eyes and i visualized my hottest most erotic fantasies involving him right on the spot and this is how it looked like......
after the performance was over, i approached him and bashfully introduced myself
and this is the conversation that ensued.
"hi name saya NinjaMuscle. kawan-kawan i panggil i Baby Bucuk."
"Oh.Name i Boi_Sachok. Tadi i peform sachok tak? Mesti sachok punye, tengok lah rambut i yg mohawk mcm babi nie abeh kaler blond. I dari tadi tengok you. You ni sachek ah"
I was soo embarassed but i was diggin his compliments,nawmean?
"takdelah. I tak lah sachek sgt. U tinggal ne? U uat ape? Waduh waduh."
"I dikir first eleven ah. Cuma yang paling sachok je boleh jadi dikir first eleven"
"eh Boi_sachok,mlm nie i nak gi hendrix atau chocolate bar ah. U nak ikut tak? kita leh minum2 Chivas Regal and pas tu dtg rumah i mlm2 tengok video.teehee.If u noe wat i mean..........." (gawddd,i can' believe i was that horny)
"Boleh ah pi i kene balik siang pasal i kene sembahyang subuh and pagi pagi i ade dikir practice. dikir practice important pasal kalau bukan kita nak preserve adat melayu,sape nak buat kan?
And kalau kita tak preserve adat melayu macam mane nak dapat budak-budak pompan sachek nak ajak gi clubbing? Betul tak?"
"betol tu abg sachok"
He then proceeded to take my number but he didn't call on Friday night. He didnt call on Saturday night too. I'm soo lonely i could cry. BOI SACHOKKK!!! WO AI NI! WEI SHE MAAAA!!
this is one of those emo moments where i take an emo picture of myself and edit it usin photoshop and add emo captions to highlight the obvious fact that i'm not getting any sex.
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
Beats Society Forum
I urge everybody and anybody who visits this blog to join the Beats Society forum.
It'd definitely help if everybody exercise their right to bitch on the forum as whining on forums are cited as the cause of the declining rates of domestic abuse by sociologists. The local scene needs more pseudo-intellectuals with their wannabe poetic ramblings giving negative criticisms while hiding behind a computer screens. So join now and stand a chance to win 5566's latest album and the whole Meteor Garden series in DVD format. Heng cute liaoz!!!
It'd definitely help if everybody exercise their right to bitch on the forum as whining on forums are cited as the cause of the declining rates of domestic abuse by sociologists. The local scene needs more pseudo-intellectuals with their wannabe poetic ramblings giving negative criticisms while hiding behind a computer screens. So join now and stand a chance to win 5566's latest album and the whole Meteor Garden series in DVD format. Heng cute liaoz!!!
Friday, November 05, 2004
Nthral Single Promo/Review
Messed Up
Lyrics: Nthral, Noodle
Beat: Nthral
Jigga was the embodiment of it. No rapper can survive without it. What's IT? Arrogance. And Nthral has tons of it judging by his new track. He practically swaggers throughout the whole track with ease and breeze even as he talks about problems,mistakes and his tactics to avoid them.
No man lives a perfect life
To earn sumthin',you go through struggle and strife
Nothin comes with an easy price
You want success,it don't come overnight
With a diction as crisp as an ironed shirt and a confident flow,he embarks on lyrical journey to right his past wrongs and override any obstacles that comes his way. The west-coast beat is reminiscent of Dr Dre circa 2001 and is drenched in G-funk. Noodle's vocals on the hook adds a sweet but not too saccharine touch to the track balancing out Nthral's thugged-out flow and she sound like a more gangsta R&B chick without the emotional baggage. The only problem is that it clocks in at 2: 55 which means if you went to take a piss when listening to this song,by the time you come back,it'll be over.Too bloody short i say. What can i say? I totally enjoyed this track and even though Nthral thinks success won't come overnight for him,it's gonna come soon enough.
(8.5 wah piangs out of 10)
contact me at alfafafa@hotmail.com for the track. Feedback is welcomed.
Lyrics: Nthral, Noodle
Beat: Nthral
Jigga was the embodiment of it. No rapper can survive without it. What's IT? Arrogance. And Nthral has tons of it judging by his new track. He practically swaggers throughout the whole track with ease and breeze even as he talks about problems,mistakes and his tactics to avoid them.
No man lives a perfect life
To earn sumthin',you go through struggle and strife
Nothin comes with an easy price
You want success,it don't come overnight
With a diction as crisp as an ironed shirt and a confident flow,he embarks on lyrical journey to right his past wrongs and override any obstacles that comes his way. The west-coast beat is reminiscent of Dr Dre circa 2001 and is drenched in G-funk. Noodle's vocals on the hook adds a sweet but not too saccharine touch to the track balancing out Nthral's thugged-out flow and she sound like a more gangsta R&B chick without the emotional baggage. The only problem is that it clocks in at 2: 55 which means if you went to take a piss when listening to this song,by the time you come back,it'll be over.Too bloody short i say. What can i say? I totally enjoyed this track and even though Nthral thinks success won't come overnight for him,it's gonna come soon enough.
(8.5 wah piangs out of 10)
contact me at alfafafa@hotmail.com for the track. Feedback is welcomed.
